Thursday, August 26, 2010

My Laughter Merry-Go-Round

A couple of the funniest real life stories that I remember involve revolving doors… and my bespectacled mom on her very first early morning commuter express train ride to a new job in Chicago… and my Nonni who was age 90 at the time of her inelegant doorway-maneuvering incident – at the lobby entrance into my post-divorce posh high-rise apartment building! Clumsy actions and humorously embarrassing events tickle my funny bone, for sure! *slapstick* Even though those particular occurrences are now distant memories (20 years ago and 10 years ago respectively) they can, and do, bring forth hysterics whenever mom and I recount the details. And I’m sure that if Nonni were alive today she would laugh out loud too (and probably be dabbing a happy tear or two with her little lace handkerchief!) A hearty belly laugh feels so good right? Right! Well, except when it doesn’t. *huh*

Yes, it’s true that laughter is really good for us humans – research has proven many wellness benefits – it’s flat out relaxation by virtue of levity! *delightful* Fortunately for me, I developed emotional resilience and a healthy dose of optimism as I grew up in a jocular family… laughing my way through the springtime of life. *grins* Oh yeah, I had my share of pain and suffering along the way to adulthood… most of it within normal limits… but some of it was quite excruciating (physical – due to corrective surgical procedures I needed, and emotional – from dad’s sudden death!) *ouch* And then, as if to put a fine point on it… adulthood has dealt a few harrowing blows too (major abdominal surgery in ’96 + a nasty divorce in 2000!) Consequently, I can completely relate to the rigid dichotomy between laughing so hard that my knees are buckling beneath me (and I’m trying not to wet myself)… and hurting so badly (you know, when it feels like your guts were ripped out) that my sense of humor goes bye-bye entirely. *harsh* But as much as I feel as though I’ve paid my dues in full to: “State of Human Existence, Department of Anguish”… apparently bona fide membership is up for renewal each and every time someone close to me is traversing along the via dolorosa segment of their own personal life journey and, because of emotional proximity, I am pelted by their venomous words or spiteful deeds. *yikes*

So now, here it is – only 2 ½ weeks since my most recent encounter with precisely such a tempestuous experience – which, in this case, was instigated by a troublemaking in-law (sometimes an in-law can be an “outlaw”!) *sheesh* And the daily ups-and-downs of my modern carousel-of-suburban-life are looking kind of funny once again (thank you very much!) Yes, I am perpetually grateful for the silly seasons of earthly habitation and being able to Laugh My A$$ Off with total abandon! Until the next fervent upheaval…

Have a fabulous week! I’ll be back here in a bit ☺


Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Head Noise Rocks

Hey! It sounds like the din of a fun party in here! *rowdy* And sometimes it sounds like the call of a whistling tea kettle… or the rhythmic song of a lively cricket serenade on a midsummer night! *wild* But wait… all of these various audio happenings are really nothing beyond the elaborate confines of my own head – ha! To say that having chronic tinnitus sucks is an understatement, for sure. There are plenty of times when I’m thinking, “I can’t stand this for one more second”…as I frantically search for the proverbial OFF button of a remedy. Yeah, probably most of the other 50 million people in the U.S. who have tinnitus don’t like it either! *bummer*

For me, it’s already been 20 years since receiving this daunting medical diagnosis… and at the time I was also told:

A) I most likely had it for quite some time before noticing it, and going in for tests.

B) It almost certainly was brought on by my attendance at rock concerts and/or listening to loud headphones as a teenager.

C) The sounds in my head are from my brain “making up” audible resonance as replacement for hearing loss caused by the aforesaid noisy activities.

D) White noise machines may be helpful at bedtime.

Now wait a sec… let me further elucidate these bullet points:

A) As a matter of fact, and now that I think back on it, there were a few times during childhood/adolescence when I remember hearing what I now consider to be “brain tunes” (especially during quiet times!)

B) Not possible. I totally did not have the means (or parental permission) to attend more than a couple concerts – they were outdoors – and my friends and I were waaay back on the lawn. Remember… I got married at 20, after one year of community college, and lived a quiet buttoned-down stay-at-home-mom life (no rambunctious college dorm mischief or university quad boisterous behavior in my life history!)

C) The M.D. specialist said this to me after the hearing test results showed only slight super-high-range loss. So then, according to him, my brain physiologically composes racket for me to listen to instead of the occasional dog whistle? I am not convinced! *ixnay*

D) Actually, I’d rather listen to my brain’s version of white noise (thank you very much!)

So as I figure it, there’s really no point in tormenting myself over the complete absence of silence in my life… I don’t need that aggravation! *chill out* Instead, I’ve decided to accept my super-hearing ability and at least acknowledge – if not enjoy – this most personal version of soul music. Apparently, my brain is tuned in (and hip to) the bona fide sounds of silence (nod to Simon & Garfunkel!)

Have a fabulous week! I’ll be back here in a bit ☺